BJ's BLOG 08/06/10 "Children"
Earlier this week we got an email from a listener named Sally who was in need of some Group Therapy. Sally was recently engaged to the father of her daughter and recently her fiancé broke it off after getting into a huge fight which involved heavy amounts of alcohol.
Sally told us that even though he doesn’t want to be in a full on relationship with her, he still wants to continue having their sexual relationship.
First off, when are people going to stop doing things out of order? Why can’t they figure out that they should get married first and then have children, because nothing good ever comes from having a child out of wedlock.
Second of all, when a man says something that stupid you really have to wonder. Men are really black and white so if you have a wishy washy man like that, there is no point in being with him because he obviously doesn’t have his crap together.
Sally also wrote in her email that she does not take having a child with someone lightly so that’s why she waited until the age of 40, but actually she did take it lightly. It was really stupid of you to make this baby with a man who isn’t your husband. She probably thought she could trap him into the marriage, but seriously women, when are you going to learn that is never going to work? If they want to marry you, they will; opening your legs and popping out a baby won’t convince them.
It’s unfair for the child to be used as a tool in your quest to get a man to love you. She should be ashamed of herself and have her baby taken away from her if this is the case. The guy probably didn’t even want to be a father in the first place and let me tell you, that kid should be with another family on that reason alone.
I grew up in a household where they “made do” with me and I wasn’t wanted by one of the parents. Now imagine that the one parent who did want you dies, and I have to live with the one who parent who made it clear that I was just a burden to them and wasn’t wanted.
Please people, just stop having children before getting married, it will ruin your lives and that poor child’s life as well.