BJ Shea

 BJ Shea

BJ'S BLOG 09/26/13 "Friends Are Not Therapists"

I am fascinated by communication. 
For my money, there’s really nothing better than good conversation. I love to talk, I love to listen…and yes, I will occasionally stop talking long enough to actually listen.
I’m also the guy who will talk to pretty much anyone. Movie star, busboy, stripper with a wooden peg-leg, 90-year-old man passed out drunk on my lawn in a Black Widow costume – I only care if you can keep up your end of the chit-chat.
The best conversations happen between good friends, of course. You know each other, you have a rhythm, and the topics can range from mundane to intensely personal. If we’re close friends, you can talk to me about anything.
Having said all that, I need to let you know that I am sick and tired of hearing you moan and whine about your never-ending relationship problems!
I’m your friend, not your therapist. You know how we all have that one friend who’s always moping around and wallowing in their own misery? You know, the friend that you finally start avoiding, because you don’t want to spend an evening out with Eeyore?
YOU ARE THAT FRIEND. Go get some therapy. I know you’re skeptical, but it’s pretty much a scientific fact that trained therapists give better advice than the average person.
Plus, they have to listen to you. That’s why you pay them.

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09/26/2013 8:17AM
BJ'S BLOG 09/26/13 "Friends Are Not Therapists"
Please Enter Your Comments Below
09/26/2013 11:15AM
Yes, BJ, yes!
Totally agree here BJ! I mean, yes, part of being someone's friend is being an ear or shoulder when they need, occasionally giving advice, but YES, sometimes the attention their problems need can be overwhelming, or sometimes their stresses may bleed over into our lives. What you describe above has totally happened to me over the last year. A friend of mine was having SO many problems and life was so awful - it was always a new drama. Sure, many of her problems were very real, but I've got enough going on in my own life, I couldn't handle trying to solve her problems for her ALL THE TIME. Also, I don't deal well with people who start downing on themselves for the sole purpose of trying to get people to say "oh no, we love you!"
09/26/2013 11:21AM
If I used my friends for therapy I'd be in more trouble than I am
09/26/2013 2:41PM
What's a therapist?
I don't have the money to see one of the whatchmacallits. I don't have many friends with relationship problems either. I don't have a relationship too. Why do peeps use you for feedback anyway?
10/04/2013 7:34AM
RE: Duh
Right there with ya hun! -
10/04/2013 7:42AM
RE: Yes, BJ, yes!
I've been in the same boat as you! Sometimes stepping back and letting them get the help they truly need is the best thing anyone can do for them. It's great to see you have a good head on your shoulders and know when not to drown yourself inmore drama. -
10/04/2013 7:48AM
RE: What's a therapist?
Well thank you for taking the time to read the blog! :) -
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