BJ'S BLOG 01/31/13 "Sharing a Bed with your Kids"
Yesterday we read an email from Ben, a Rock-A-Holic who was having problems with his girlfriend’s sleeping buddy.
His girlfriend of 11 months has a 3-year-old daughter and she lets the little girl sleep in her bed every night.
He’s thinking of telling her that if things don’t change, he doesn’t see their relationship going much further, but wanted our advice.
I’ve never understood the “community bed” idea; I really believe it’s more about mother’s who don’t want to cut the cord with their kids. A parent needs to cut that cord, so their kid can be on its way to becoming an autonomous being. It is a parent’s job to prepare them for the world and by having the kid sleep in the same bed as them doesn’t help.
During the topic, a listener named Jaime called and said that when her kids were 2 and 3 years old and she was still single, she would have them sleep with her. Once she got a boyfriend and wanted to form an intimate relationship with this guy, she made it a point to move her kids in their own rooms. I do give her props for at least moving the kids to their own beds once she go into a relationship but this kind of behavior needs to stop.
Some women treat their children like they are some kind of toy or some form of therapy for them. A mother’s job is to raise her children; the kids shouldn’t be the ones the parents depend on for comfort. If they happen to be comforting in the middle of everything, then that’s a bonus, but parents have to be there for their kids, not the other way around!
This society has seemed to have forgotten that! It seems like some people have kids just to bring them happiness and unconditional love just like buying a pet would, but I’m here to say that is wrong! Get the kids out of your beds, and if you don’t want to be alone at night, get a nightlight or teddy bear for yourself and start being a real parent to your kids.
Tags : Topics : Human Interest