If you’re reading this blog at work, I hope you made sure your boss isn’t watching! We don’t want any trouble in the workplace, do we?
Today’s request for Group Therapy comes from Jacqueline, who is worried that her boyfriend’s boss might be interested in creating a different kind of trouble for him. The boyfriend recently got a fantastic job with a big company; this was a surprise to Jacqueline, who didn’t think he was qualified enough to even apply for the job in the first place!
Some girlfriends might be proud of this achievement, but Jacqueline suspects that her boyfriend might have been chosen for non-professional reasons. After all, the boss is a woman, and only 7 years older than Jacqueline’s boyfriend.
Wait, there’s more! The boss added the boyfriend on Facebook, and he added her back! GASP! Now they’re friends on a social media site!
(I note for posterity that the Facebook information in Jacqueline’s message was typed in ALL CAPS, which means that it’s pretty major, right?)
With her suspicions already raised, Jacqueline went snooping on the boss’s Facebook page, and discovered that her husband looks a lot like J’s boyfriend: their height, build, hair color, eye color, and even eyeglass style are all very similar!
(My daughter calls this kind of social media stalking “creeper” behavior. Make of that what you will.)
We’re getting more women participating in Group Therapy, and we really do love to see that happen. However, this situation really illustrates the point that women have just as much “stuff” to deal with as men. Speaking from the male point of view, I think that the best thing a man could do in a case like this is to combat those jealous feelings and fears by being the very best partner they can be. Don’t be afraid of losing your mate to someone better…just BE someone better.
(I would assume that this advice would work just as easily for women, but what do I know?)
You’ve heard my two cents, and now Jacqueline wants to hear from her fellow Rock-A-Holics! Do you think her jealousy and suspicions are stepping out of line, or is she justified in her thinking?
I don't know how to break this to you so straight to the point. Your boyfriend has already slept with her. The fact that they friended each other on Facebook. That is not the type of professional relationship that an employee and supervisor have. I say this because I have seen it before and it never ends well for anybody. When her bosses find out both of them will more than likely be unemployed and you and your daughter will be collateral damage if you depend on him in any way for monetary support.. Get out now.
RE: Your boyfriend.
Could it be with this new generation of workplaces that it's just part of being a "cool boss'"? Maybe she sees a spark of potential in him and wants to see him succeed. Either way, the fact that Jacqueline has what looks like zerotrust in her man is a red flag. I just hope they can work everything out. - Vicky B