BJ Shea

 BJ Shea


BJ'S BLOG 05/01/14 "Too Much Wine..."

Trust isn’t just given out freely…it’s earned. Rest assured, you can always put your faith in Group Therapy! Our legion of Rock-A-Holics can’t be wrong!
 
(P.S. - No refunds.)
 
We’re going to see if we can help Kate, who recently uncovered a big secret that her husband of three years had been keeping from her. Apparently, Kate had a couple of glasses of wine, and ended up snooping through her hubby’s email while he was asleep. She says he left his laptop open (which, as we all know, gives someone a legal and moral right to start poking around in their mate’s private business.)
 
Kate says she is completely aware that what she did was wrong, but that didn’t stop her.
 
I don’t know if we’re off to a good start here, with “too much wine” and “open laptop” as excuses for snooping…but let’s see where this goes.
 
Kate found a folder on her husband’s computer marked “Random Stuff”, but the contents of said folder were anything but random: inside, there was a profile for a gay male dating site. Can you guess whose profile it was? I bet you can…
 
The account was made before Kate and her husband got together, and she also admits that it wasn’t active when she went online looking for it. Still, she confronted her husband about it, and his reaction came in the form of equal parts anger and embarrassment.
 
He said that it was all a joke, part of a contest between a few of his male friends to see which one of them could get the most responses from a gay male singles ad. After the contest was over, they all deleted their accounts.
 
Kate is having trouble believing her husband’s story, and she wants to know if she should check with his friends to verify the claim!
 
I have to be honest here: this makes me absolutely livid. Just reading over this blog post again makes me punching, kicking, yelling, and breaking stuff ANGRY.
 
(I’m not going to do any of those things in real life, and neither should you, but I am doing some serious damage to the air around me right now. I should probably stop all this pretend punching and kicking, though, because the studio isn’t very big, and our equipment is expensive.)
 
You want to talk about trust? I’m sure Kate’s a perfectly decent person, but this is a complete violation of the good faith between a man and a woman. The snooping was bad enough – and you automatically lose points when you blame it on the wine – but getting your question answered and not putting enough trust in your partner to believe that answer is NOT GOOD.
 
I can’t even deal with this. Let’s hear your open and honest feedback, Rock-A-Holics!


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05/01/2014 8:29AM
BJ'S BLOG 05/01/14 "Too Much Wine..."
Please Enter Your Comments Below
05/01/2014 12:25PM
Random Stuff
I have to say, before I even got to the husband's explanation, I was already thinking is was a joke/prank buy his guys friends. I know that my friends and I would do something like that to each other for some laughs and I'm a female. Clearly the account wasn't active. It was done in his single days as a joke with friends. It wasn't in a folder labeled " SECRET PAST" It was labeled "RANDOM STUFF" which is exactly what it was.
05/01/2014 1:15PM
He shouldnt trust her
If she didnt trust his answer she obviously didnt trust him before this even though he should be the one distrusting her. A few of my friends have done something like this before, he was having fun and even if he was bi curious back before he met her hewas back before he met her why the hell should it matter? If i was him i would break up with her.
05/01/2014 11:44PM
No trust already.
She clearly didn't trust him to begin with, or she wouldn't have been motivated to snoop, wine or no wine. He should be worried. Furthermore, she's dumb and should move to Siberia.
05/02/2014 9:08AM
Get a Divorce Now before you have kids....please!
Dear Kate, Your marriage is doomed to fail. You have no trust in your husband. First you went snooping on his computer, that would be like him rifling through your purse. Then you have audacity to not take him for his word. Let's face it, you will always doubt everything he tells you. In fact it seems to me you are doomed to several failed marriages, and life alone at your death. You have no faith in man. And this unfortunately cannot be changed, unlearned or removed from your personality. Most likely you grew up in a home with trust issues involving your parentals. Please do the taxpayer and your husband a favor get a divorce now and don't bring any kids into the world. -Jeffro in Lakewood
05/02/2014 11:33AM
Uh oh
Sometimes people do stupid things ... Like snooping on their spouse. Now that she has an explanation about the website, she either accepts that or not. I wouldn't accept that answer. I would check it out. If he lied about his sexual orientation he is just as bad as she is for snooping and they have more issues to deal with than trust.
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