BJ'S BLOG 06/13/13 "Home Wrecker"
A Rock-A-Holic named Trisha wrote in asking for some relationship advice which we addressed in Group Therapy yesterday.
Trisha and her boyfriend have been together for nearly two years but before that, he was with his ex for 11 years!
He cheated on his ex with her and eventually left to be with Trisha. There was a cross over period where he was still living with his ex of about six months while he was with Trisha but slept in separate beds…as far as we know.
He has since moved out and has his own place. Trisha’s biggest insecurity she says is that even though they have been together for two years, he still hasn’t told his family about her and some of them don’t even know that he left his ex yet!
She took it upon herself to look through his phone, and she found texts from his family and his ex’s family which pass along regards to both of them. So not only has he not said anything to his family, some of his ex’s family doesn’t know about the break up either.
Trisha wanted to know if she should give him an ultimatum: if he doesn’t introduce her to his family by the end of this month, she will leave.
There is so much very wrong with this situation.
I know this is going to harsh but Trisha wrecked an 11 year relationship! What I think is missing in this situation and even in society is a man’s directness especially in the Pacific Northwest! Most men have lost that directness and in order to spare someone’s feelings, they won’t be honest.
Well here is the truth, Trisha is a big girl now, and she has to realize that she’s a home wrecker! When you’re with a person that allows you to wreck their home, what do you think you’re getting into? “There is no honor amongst thieves.” When you deal with dishonorable people, you get unfavorable results. Trisha needs to see that her boyfriend is a leopard who may never change his “cheating” spots.