BJ Shea

 BJ Shea


BJ'S BLOG 01/30/15 "Lazy Coworker"

I’m sure you’re all SUPER BUSY with your Friday workload, but we’d really appreciate you helping out a fellow Rock-A-Holic with some Group Therapy!
 
We heard from Kevin, who has a coworker is constantly complaining that he can’t help out, or take on new projects…but whenever he passes the guy’s desk, he’s surfing the net or playing a game.
 
I think we all know this coworker; unfortunately, mine is my son! I guess we should save that nugget for a very personal Group Therapy session, and focus our efforts on helping Kevin. He says that the lazy guy’s duty-shirking is a pretty open secret, but no one seems willing to confront the issue. Kevin is pretty tired of everyone else picking up the slack, but he’s worried about being perceived as a snitch if he takes this matter to the boss.
 
What kind of advice do you have for Kevin, friends?
 
(Oh, and let’s not forget this very important parting wish: GO HAWKS!)
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BJ'S BLOG 01/29/15 "Super Bowl Commercials"

There are people in the world who don’t love football, but still tune into the Super Bowl for the incredible commercials. Big companies, charitable organizations, and film studios all come together to maximize their advertising reach, and they usually try their best to bring the goods to the viewing public.
 
One company that has definitely raised its profile via a run of sexy Super Bowl commercials is Go Daddy Dot Com. This is definitely an organization that focuses their marketing on the male audience.
 
This year, Go Daddy is already courting controversy with an ad that parodies a very popular Budweiser commercial featuring a sad puppy who gets adopted at the end. In Go Daddy’s version, the puppy is sold online to what appears to be a dog breeder! I’m sure you won’t be surprised to hear that animal activists have already started howling about this one, and Go Daddy ended up pulling the ad.
 
Look, I love animals, but some of these people really irritate me, and I’m not just talking about the animal rights folks. I thought the commercial was funny, and completely harmless, but someone always has to red-line the Outrage Meter. Do whatever you’d like to white males in your ads, but if you even make a joke about pets, women, children, non-white ethnicities, or ANYONE who isn’t a straight white guy…you’re in trouble.
 
How do you feel about this, gang?
 
P.S. – No animals were harmed in the making of this blog. We promise.
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BJ'S BLOG 01/28/15 "Kids Clothes"

Hey, gang! Take some time out of your busy day to enjoy some Group Therapy! Someday, the Rock-A-Holic who needs help may be YOU!
 
We’re hoping to offer some assistance to Kim, who has a boyfriend with a 7-year-old son. The kid’s mom insists on dressing the young man in shirts that say things like COOL DUDE COMIN’ THROUGH, and Kim thinks it’s just ridiculous.
 
For her part, Kim buys the kid some “cooler” clothes when she and his father have custody of him – half of each week – but those clothes go back to his mom’s house when he leaves, and they never seem to come back. Kim wants the mom to step up her dressing game, and she also wants to see her own purchases return. If not, she thinks the mom should pay up to make up for it!
 
Kim, you’re heading into dangerous territory here. Like it or not, the kid’s mom is his mom, and she’s just doing her job. You’re not even his stepmother! This is NOT YOUR KID. It’s great that you want to be involved with your boyfriend’s son, but you make it sound like more of a Cool Kid Contest that you’re desperate to win.
 
Competitive Girlfriend Comin’ Through!
 
Let’s hear it from you, cool kids! Is Kim overstepping her boundaries, or is my attitude just out of fashion?
 
 
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BJ'S BLOG 01/27/15 "NFL Hypocrisy"

Hey, kids! Do you like a sporting organization that openly practices double standards, and demonstrates hypocrisy on a regular basis? Look no further than the National Football League! 

While the New England Patriots seem to be avoiding trouble, despite the controversy over their saggy balls, our own Marshawn Lynch was recently fined $22,000 for grabbing his crotch during a game, with a warning that the Seahawks will be penalized in game yardage (15 yards per offense) if Lynch does it doing the Super Bowl. 

MEANWHILE, the NFL online shop is currently sold out of a framed picture that includes a shot of Marshawn’s fineable grab; that’s right, the NFL was more than happy to profit from the crotch-grab, to the tune of $150 a pop!

I have no love for the grabbing of one’s crotch as a public gesture, but I’m also not a fan of people profiting from hypocrisy. The NFL says the photo collage was an oversight, which is just a lame excuse for being caught out in arrogant, morally deficient behavior. 
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BJ'S BLOG 01/26/15 "Oreos, Deflated Balls, and Justin Bieber"

Today's blog comes from one of my mentors, Dan Sanders, 

Why do those three totally unrelated topics seem to fit together so well? Let us start with Oreos. Red Velvet is here, a red-tinged chocolaty cookie with a cream cheese-type filling instead of the traditional filling. These cookies are set to hit stores nationwide on February 2, Groundhog Day. This does not mean I’ll make a hog out of myself, but I am planning on following the delivery truck and stockpiling since the Red Velvet Oreo will be sold only for six to eight weeks. While much to the horror of many, I’m sure, I have never been a big Oreo fan, but this one I will try.

Before we get to Justin Bieber, let us speak for a minute about deflated balls (now stay with me and don’t get confused. I mean footballs, of course). Even non-sports fans must have heard about this story. The NFL discovered that 11 of the 12 footballs the Patriots used to trounce the Colts were underinflated by 2 pounds. Imagine 32 ounces of pigskin making a 45-7 win possible when in fact the Patriots would have won 21-7 if all they had were LeGarrette Blount’s 3 rushing touchdowns. That’s rushing, not throwing and catching, but rushing, as in running and running. In high school our coach use to throw what felt like rocks at us in practice because it got us ready for regulation footballs, which were somewhat softer and easier to catch than the hard ones in practice. Softer footballs, which are also easier to intercept if you can get your hands on them, wouldn’t explain this 38-point difference. Cheating is cheating, though, and there will be more on that in the podcast.

Now from deflated balls to no, er, what is the word? Hmm. Ah, nuts. Comedy Central is going to roast Justin Bieber. It’s unclear whether he will be skewered first, but one can always hope. It seems the Biebe has always wanted to be skewered, I mean roasted, and Comedy Central said the only reason it hasn’t been done yet is there was not enough material until now. The date has not been set, but I have a line for the roasting: when Justin lays an egg, he throws it at his neighbor’s house (crowd erupts with laughter, Bieber cackles).

I have no idea what else will be on the shores of Rambling Harbor, but join me there and we’ll find out together.

http://dbsanders.podbean.com/e/oreos-deflated-balls-and-justin-bieber/
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BJ'S BLOG 01/23/15 "A Daughter's Secret"

Group Therapy is all about Rock-A-Holics helping Rock-A-Holics!
 
We heard from Will, who recently learned that his daughter has been keeping a secret: she’s a stripper!
 
Will’s daughter lives with a friend, and she told her parents that they both work at a bar as servers. On a recent night out with the guys, Will learned the truth in the worst way possible: he actually saw his daughter performing at the strip club that he and his buddies had chosen for their evening entertainment. Will immediately departed, and he managed to make it out before his daughter spotted him.
 
Will didn’t say if his friends stayed at the gentlemen’s club or not. Personally, if I saw a friend’s daughter stripping in a club, I would evacuate at a high rate of speed. An enemy’s daughter…well, that’s a different situation, but let’s stay on topic.
 
Speaking as a father, my own daughter has been independent since she was fairly young, and I love her for that, but there have definitely been times when I wondered if she might take that path, if only to prove that she could make her own decisions. If things ever went that way, I would love her regardless; that being said, I think most parents would prefer a different life path for their children.
 
Here’s the problem: Will hasn’t told his wife about their daughter’s secret, and the daughter doesn’t know that he found out in the first place. Heck, we’re not even sure if Will’s wife is aware that he was at a strip club with his buddies.
 
Rock-A-Holics, this guy needs some serious advice, so let’s hear what you have to say! I’m especially interested in hearing from strippers who have struggled with telling their family the truth!
 
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BJ'S BLOG 01/22/15 "Dog Custody"

Group Therapy is going to the dogs! Well…okay, it’s going to the dogs on a shared custody basis, so that’s one-week-on-one-week-off. I hope that’s an agreeable plan for all you Rock-A-Holics out there.
 
Today’s topic comes from Tom, who was in a serious relationship with a woman for four years. Two years into the relationship, they got a dog together. Sounds really cute, right?
 
Well, they broke up recently, and they were really unsure about what they should do with the hound. They arrived at a solution that has them sharing custody, with the dog going back and forth every week. As you might expect, Tom is dating other people now, and he says that the new girlfriends in his life are irritated by the canine rotation. They believe he is using the dog as an excuse to keep the girlfriend in his life, in the hope that they’ll eventually get back together.
 
Is it weird to share custody of a pet? I know Seattle is a very animal-friendly city, but this one is a little bit beyond my own personal experience. Rock-A-Holics, we need you to sound off and give Tom some doggone* good advice!
 
*-I am so very sorry for that terrible joke. Really. That one was RUFF, and I know it.
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BJ'S BLOG 01/21/14 "Odd Request"

Group Therapy needs YOU, good people!
 
A Rock-A-Holic by the name of Monica has come to us for advice, following an odd request from her co-worker: this woman wants Monica to hit on her boyfriend to see if he’ll take the bait! The co-worker and her man have been together for about four months, and she feels some kind of urge to test his resolve, and see if he’s serious.
 
The boyfriend goes to the same happy hour every week, and the co-worker says that Monica is his “type”, so she wants to find out if her boyfriend will cheat if a woman approaches him.
 
Oh, this makes me immediately angry, but not with Monica; she’s clearly caught in the middle, and the fact that she’s conflicted enough to reach out for some advice tells me that she’s probably a thoughtful, decent person. What kind of insecurity leads a woman to instigate a trap like this?
 
I’m turning this one over to you, folks. What advice do you have for Monica?
BONUS HONESTY POINTS if you’ve been in a similar situation, and want to share your story…
 
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BJ'S BLOG 01/20/15 "Winter and the Lonely Surfer"

Today's blog comes from one of my mentors, Dan Sanders:
 
It’s mid-January at Rambling Harbor, and it seems as if the sun has not shown in months. We rejoice if the temperatures break the freezing mark. Me, I’ve been playing surfing music, Jimmy Buffett and any other tropical tunes I can think of. A mile from my home is the part of the beach that has the best waves, and even on a 10-degree day, with colder wind chill, you will still see some lonely soul either waiting for a wave, or just waiting, and I start reminiscing.

The dark night is a lonely time, and I hate it. My favorite time to be on the ocean was always the evening, and I would sit next to the calm sea, sun fading behind me. I would sit waiting for the ocean to erupt into a massive, raging wall of water that would be so demanding of my body and mind that I would have no time to feel alone or dread the night, and I would ride it. Ignoring it was not an option, and dying was always a possibility.

Many times my best surfing was when the ocean was calm. I would go out when the likelihood of good waves did not exist. I wanted the calmness. I could surf the universe in my mind, the dreams, the fears, and the unknown—sit on the water and barrel through the clouds in the sky. The ocean was and always will be the expression of the mysterious, especially at night. I wanted the depths of the darkness to talk to me, the ocean, the endless unknown ocean, where I could hear the splash of life. A porpoise? A fish? A shark? I knew there were no answers to the night sounds of the waters around me. I would feel a stir beneath my feet, a few small fish or a squid or maybe something larger out for an evening meal. The ocean scared me and yet lured me back again and again, especially at dusk. As the night grew darker, the ocean and its hidden mysteries grew deeper, more daring, daring me to stay a minute longer and wait to see what danger there might be. To me, life was made solid, tangible, won or lost on a quick ride. Like the mysteries of life, as I sat there alone, I could absorb the loss of certainty, almost touch it, hold it, and I could sink or swim, no longer a metaphor but a fact. If a wave came I could rise or fall, retaining some control, always a choice I liked.

What about the actual surfing?  In those days most surfboards were made of Koa, a wood found in Hawaii. The original boards, called papahe'enalu in the native language, measured from 8 feet to 15 feet long and were very heavy. There is nothing like the feeling of a tube ride, hearing only the roar of the ocean as the wave breaks over your head, alone, against one of the mightiest forces ever created. You cannot control it. The best you can hope for is to ride the waves to the safety of land. Sometimes they will spin you around like a piece of cloth in a giant washer and slam your body against the bottom, knocking the breath out of you. You know at that instant that in some small way you have come face-to-face with death, but you rise to the top and let the rest of the wave carry you home.

There’s more on the safe shores of Rambling Harbor. Join me there.
 
http://dbsanders.podbean.com/
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BJ'S BLOG 01/16/15 "Second-Hand Present"

Nicole is a big fan of Group Therapy, but like so many of her fellow Rock-A-Holics, she never thought that she’d have to ask us for help with a problem of her own.
 
You came to the right place, Nicole! We’ll do our best to sort this situation out for you!
 
Nicole’s fiancee got her a beautiful diamond necklace for her birthday, much to her surprise. She couldn’t believe that he had splashed out the cash for such a wonderful gift, so she wore it to work the following Monday, simply to show off her new favorite piece of jewelry…
 
…and that’s when she got the bad news.
 
A co-worker who knows Nicole’s man revealed that the necklace had once belonged to the ex-wife of the groom-to-be, but she lost it to him in the divorce. She even showed Nicole a picture of the ex-wife wearing the piece.
 
I’m sure you won’t be surprised when I say that Nicole was pretty unhappy about this new bit of information. She is extremely upset, and her reactions are ranging from “refuse the second-hand gift” to “break off the relationship over it”.
 
On the one hand, I am annoyed that Nicole’s co-worker felt the need to drop this bomb, upsetting Nicole in the process; on the other hand, Nicole was flaunting it a little…but isn’t that what you do with new jewelry? I suppose the information was bound to get out eventually.
 
Let’s give this long-time-listener-first-time-writer the assistance she needs, good people! What do you think Nicole should do about her secondhand sparkly?
 
 
 
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