This particular topic came via an urgent text message, sent by a man in trouble in the wee hours of the morning:
Having just returned from his bachelor party weekend in Las Vegas, Dylan is in hot water, and he’s reaching out for Group Therapy. This already sounds bad, but maybe we should find out what Dylan is so worried about…
Dylan came home from Las Vegas with a hickey, and his fiancee isn’t very happy about that. Of course, Dylan swears that this is all a misunderstanding; yes, the hickey came from a stripper, but Dylan says his friends paid the stripper to do it, as a practical joke. The fiance knew that the bachelor party would involve strip clubs, so that’s not the issue. Dylan swears the hickey wasn’t a sensual experience; it was all a big prank!
Here’s where the story takes a sharp turn: The bride-to-be is not just angry…she’s threatening to call off the wedding!
I have a big problem with this. The most important day of their lives together, and she’s holding it over Dylan’s head because of a stripper hickey? Is that the breaking point for a relationship that’s barely underway? Or is it a sign that Dylan’s fiancee may have some serious issues to work out on her own?
Maybe I’m thinking about this the wrong way. After all, I hate the idea of receiving a hickey – seriously, I have no interest in getting marked up like that. It does nothing for me. I suppose it’s possible that, if a woman enjoys receiving (or giving) hickeys, this might be a bigger deal for her.
It doesn’t change the fact that she’s holding her own wedding hostage over a tacky-looking neck bite. The way I see it, her reaction is an even bigger sign of trouble for this relationship. If she doesn’t call it off, maybe Dylan will…
I see two major issues at play here. Control and trust. If she truly can not get over the hickey and does not believe her fiancé that it was a prank, then they have no business getting married. On the other hand, if she believes it is just a prank; and still threatens her fiancé in this way; then he's better off getting out now. I'm just not a jealous personality, so maybe I look at it differently than most, but I don't understand expending any energy at all on this issue. I trusted my late husband completely and had no desire to control him. I would have laughed and maybe teased him about it a little. In fact, I do not believe it is ever okay to hold ending the relationship over your significant other's head in this way unless you are absolutely ready to walk out the door. Michelle Annette
Don't blame her
I think she has a valid point. I don't know if she should call off the wedding but I can see why she wouldn't want her soon to be husband being marked up by another women even if it was a prank. Women are very emotionally invested in there wedding day. It probably would have been laughed off if they were still dating. Once he made the choice to commit to her she probably assumed that meant he was choosing her and he is off limits to other women touching him like that. Plus who the hell gets hickey's anyways? What is he 13? When you are making adult choices like marriage you have to be ready for adult consequences to immature behavior.
Not her fault
Are people crazy? REALLY? A hickey as a joke, sure. It was more then just a hickey. And EVERYONE including the fiancé knows it, that's why she is questioning the wedding day. What else would he say besides it was a prank? Lets reverse it, if she went to vegas and came home with hickeys, would we expect her man to say... no biggie! No, all his family, friends, and co workers would tell him to think hard about if this is the type of woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with. And you know it.
Personally I think the wedding should be called off by both. There's obviously some serious issues with both of them, and they both need to work those out. Marriage is no joke, and if there's already things like that happening, could you only imagine when their never apart. I mean seriously!
This is a no no for me!!
This really was a bad joke!! I understand why she is angry on that level, just come to think of it, put yourselves on her shoes, would you like to see your wife-to-be with a Hinckey close to her "chest área" or even somewhere else, on the neck...
Always put yourself on somebody else's shoes... the answer will come to you eventually.