Yesterday during the Lukewarm Topic of the Day, we talked about why 18-year-old Miss Delaware Teen USA had to give up her crown.
Former Miss Delaware Teen USA, Melissa King, who was crowned this past November, had to resign after a porn video of her surfaced online.
Melissa said in the interview before the actual porn video that she was doing it for the money.
She grew up as a foster kid and her platform for Miss Teen USA was to help work with and mentor foster children.
She’s had a difficult life and is just trying to make a living. I don’t hold any judgment towards her. I think it’s hypocritical that any beauty pageant would fault her for using her looks to make money when that’s the whole point of a pageant! They make money and get attention for the way they look!
Most beauty pageant contestants say they draw the line at “selling their body” and doing porn, but being in magazines and trying to be crowned at a pageant is the same thing. They’re using their looks for money and looking down on Melissa for doing what she did to earn money is just ridiculous!
Yesterday we read an email from a Rock-A-Holic named Cassie who was having issues with her boyfriend and his Facebook relationship status.
Cassie’s boyfriend is a widower; his wife passed away three years ago and Cassie and him have been together for two years.
To this day, he still hasn’t changed his Facebook relationship status from “widowed” to “in a relationship.”
Every time she brings it up, it turns into a huge fight. He says that the reason he hasn’t changed his status is because he is not ready to answer the questions from his friends and family about their relationship.
She wanted to know if she should be as hurt as offended as she’s feeling or try to be more understanding.
I remember when people used to have to wait a long time after their spouse passed away before they started seeing someone else.
That happened in my family; my dad used to get grief because he moved on to quickly in other people’s eyes and I have a feeling that her boyfriend doesn’t want the same thing to happen to him.
Death is a powerful issue and societal morays are a powerful issue so it makes sense that this is an enormously difficult topic.
It says “till death do us part” and I think it’s ridiculous to be mad at someone who is trying to move on from death. Why would anyone get pissed when you moved on to another relationship at a time where it is “acceptable?”
It’s ludicrous when a family member or friend says they don't like the new person just because they feel like they are “replacing” their lost loved one. They need to realize that expecting a widowed person to stay single forever is a selfish thing. Death sucks, but you need to find a way to get over it; go see a counselor to get through the grieving process.
Nothing infuriates me more than someone who keeps pining over a death. News flash, it happens to everyone! I had to experience it at a young age when I lost my parents.
I'm having a great life, and I'm not going to screw that up over death.
That being said, Cassie shouldn’t be pushing her boyfriend to do something that is painful to him over something of little importance. What she should see is how much he cares about her and that he’s with her, not a stupid Facebook status.
Yesterday we read an email from a Rock-A-Holic named Gordon who needed some help deciding if he should tell his buddy a secret about his new girlfriend.
Gordon went out with a woman briefly who he liked but they soon found out they were better off as friends. He was glad though because he introduced his buddy to her and they hit it off.
The problem is, he never told his friend that he slept with her and is wondering if he should tell him. He’s worried that his buddy will think he’s dating Gordon’s sloppy seconds and if that does come out, should he be the one to tell him or her?
Do we really have to tell everyone everything in life now? Is that what we’ve come to, not having any more privacy? It seems like we can’t just take something to the grave anymore, it has to be out in the open for everyone to see.
If the friend does find out he can just explain that it didn’t mean anything and that out of respect to him he kept it quiet. Just make yourself look like the dummy and tell him that she is now with the better guy and if he’s a good guy, he will understand. Who needs the drama? Life would be so much easier if people would just keep things to themselves once-in-awhile.
On Friday during Listeners on the Loose, a Rock-A-Holic named Joey called in and we talked about how prostitution used to be one of the things Seattle was known for back in the day.
This got me thinking about how prostitution is still illegal to this day. Many people disagree with me but I believe that prostitution should be legalized; it would be a lot safer and it would give us the chance to catch real criminals. The amount of human sex trafficking and underage girls/guys being involved with this would drastically decrease because people would be going to places where it’s safe and legal.
If a person is hungry, they can go to a restaurant. If a person wants their house cleaned, they can hire a maid. Why is it that if a person is looking for physical intimacy, that they can’t go and get that taken care of with no drama?
Trust me, there are many benefits to having this legalized, but until people get out of their old way of thinking, it will never change.
Today we will be revisiting an older blog that I wrote which gave good advice about knowing when a person should consider therapy instead of leaning on their friends.
A few months back, we read a Facebook message from a Rock-A-Holic named Jared. Jared’s friend had just gotten out of a two year relationship and said that he still wants to be friends with his ex. The problem is that the friend’s ex told the friend’s dad that she wants to get a restraining order against him and this isn’t the first time she has involved the cops in their relationship.
Jared has known this guy for years and has tried to get him to cut ties with this woman but this guy still insists he cares about her.
He didn’t know if he should still try to help this guy or to just stay out of it even though he asks for Jared’s advice.
This is a hard thing; I understand wanting to help a friend but why do we have to become other people’s therapists?
I have no training in the field of psychology so I cannot give you the help you need when it involves a serious problem!
It’s always the people who say that therapy is dumb and a waste of time that pesters their friends and relatives for advice they should get from a real therapist!
The best thing Jared and anyone else in this situation can do for his friend is to tell him to go to counselor because they are the only ones who can help his friend before he does something he will regret.
Last week, we received an email from a Rock-A-Holic who was getting made fun of by his coworkers for his Valentine’s Day plans.
When he was discussing his Valentine’s Days plans with his wife to his mother, she became really sad and feeling guilty, James invited her to join him and his wife.
His wife said she didn’t mind but when he told his co-workers, they said that it was a guise and that she doesn’t want her mother-in-law ruining her date.
He explains that his mother is a single 65-year-old who says she doesn’t want a relationship but complains all the time about being single.
One thing I’ve noticed in life is when that the older a woman gets, the more she needs a good partner in her life to help her get through the changes she will experience.
There is a lot that goes on hormonally, the kids leave the nest, and some women really need someone strong to help them get through that.
It’s the same things with young guys; my wife helped me through my tough times when I was younger and now I get to do the same for her.
James’s mother really needs to find someone else to lean on instead of guilt tripping her son whenever she is feeling lonely. Some women think that when they feel pain, they are allowed to do whatever they want in order to not be in pain including hurting others so they can feel what they feel.
His mom really needs to find someone that is strong enough to help her through this portion of her life, and leave her son to his own life with his wife.
Yesterday on the show, we gave an update on the whole Christopher Dorner situation.
For those who don’t know the story, early this month, there was a series of shootings that occurred in California where the victims were law officers, their families, or civilians misidentified as the suspect.
Dorner was named as a suspect and was wanted in connection to these shootings that occurred that killed four people and wounded three others.
Another big part of the story is when Dorner allegedly posted a manifesto on Facebook which cited being fired from the LAPD in 2008 for reporting fellow police officer for using excessive force.
Dorner was terminated for filing a report concerning Teresa Evans, (now a sergeant), for excessive force, which the police claim is false. Dorner accused Officer Evans of kicking suspect Christopher Gettler in the face while he was handcuffed and lying on the ground. No action was taken against Officer Evans.
It has still not been confirmed, but there are reports of a charred body that was found inside the burning building they think he had been staying in for the last few days.
I just think that it's time that we as Americans demand that people in high stress jobs like the military and police force, provide enough recourses to help those folks cope with whatever is going on in their lives.
These are not normal jobs yet we expect them to act like the rest of us. I'm sorry, but people who have a 9 to 5 gig, bagging groceries, building houses, or sitting behind a computer all day do not have it near as badly as those in the military or police force. We have to stop misjudging their stressful work environments.
Yesterday on the show we played audio of the latest zombie prank someone pulled off.
Now we’ve seen pictures of people hacking into the electronic road work signs warning people about a zombie invasion, but these pranksters took it to another level.
Someone hacked into the emergency alert system in Montana to warn the residents of a zombie attack, and it actually aired on the CW network!
Here is a video of what it looked like:
That was the Emergency Alert System! We have a test that plays on our station regularly! The point of the Emergency Alert System (EAS) is to warn us in case something bad happens, and some jack-a-lope decides to hack into it!
How can we trust the EAS in case something bad does happen! I used to believe that certain parts of the government are impenetrable…at least I did until I saw something like this happen.
Yesterday on the show, we read an email from a Rock-A-Holic named Carly, who needed some Group Therapy.
Carly has been seeing a guy for a few months but it wasn’t until recently that they became exclusive. Before they made it official, they were free to see other people, which she hated!
This is their first Valentine’s Day as a real couple but unfortunately her boyfriend said he has to work late and can’t go out that night.
Since they only recently became exclusive, Carly is worried that he is actually spending that day with another woman and was considering dropping by his office with dinner either unannounced.
When I first got together with my wife, I was in a similar situation; she wanted to see other people and even though I didn’t like it, I put it up with it because I wanted to be with her.
Even thought my marriage is great now, I would never put myself in this situation again because I now have much higher self esteem.
Why would a person get into a relationship that made them uncomfortable and didn’t work for them unless they had low self esteem and thought this was the best that they could do?
I believe that Carly has been cheated on before which is why she doesn’t trust this guy. If you can’t trust someone, why be with them?
Also, to all the guys who are in the boyfriend’s situation I’d like to ask, what kind of a guy are you that you would stay in a relationship with a person who thinks you are a cheater? What would make a person think they deserve to be with someone who doesn’t trust them?
People don’t need to be in a relationship where they either don’t feel comfortable with the situation or where trust is an issue. If we all stood up and said “I don't need this and I'm leaving,” the world would be a much better place, because you don't need anyone if you are happy with yourself.
Last week we talked about a new sports craze for children that have some people worried.
MMA (mixed martial arts) has been popular for a while, but ESPN the Magazine reports there are currently 3.2 million kids under the age of 13 taking part in MMA schools.
The videos of these little kids really going at it are a little disturbing, but I think it’s because I’ve just been indoctrinated to think that way.
CNN interviewed a mother named Bernadette Thone, who lets her son participate in a league.
Bernadette said in the interview that no sport is exempt from injuries and that she can’t let her own fears keep her son from doing something he is good at. She also went on saying that martial arts is about respect, courage, and good sportsmanship, all of which her son can carry with him for the rest of his life.
How she explained this is exactly what I would want any mother to say about their boys. I feel like this matriarchal society is over coddling today’s little boys but I agree with everything this mother had to say.
Check out the video here: http://www.hlntv.com/video/2013/02/04/raw-kid-fight-club-mom-defends-son-being-mma-league
I think MMA is awesome and teaching kids martial arts has always been a good thing because it teaches them about the honor of physical interaction. It is a great code for them to live by and if they have a great sensei, they have the potential to become amazing human beings.
Yesterday on the show, we talked about how there is an online campaign to try to get a woman who was fired, her job back.
Ex Applebee’s server Chelsea Welch was fired after posting a picture of a receipt from a customer who refused to tip her. On the receipt, customer Pastor Alios Bell wrote, “I give God 10%. why do you get 18?”
Chelsea posted a picture of the receipt on the website Reddit and when Pastor Bell heard about it, she contacted to Applebee’s to express frustration.
Applebee did confirm that Chelsea was let go and released a statement regarding the incident: Our Guests’ personal information – including their meal check – is private, and neither Applebee’s nor its franchisees have a right to share this information publicly. We value our Guests’ trust above all else. Our franchisee has apologized to the Guest and has taken disciplinary action with the Team Member for violating their Guest’s right to privacy. This individual is no longer employed by the franchisee.
I heard the audio of the pastor and she sounds like such a cocky arrogant woman! I couldn’t believe she is a person of the cloth! She said in an interview that she had a lapse in judgment and that she apologizes for that but she also said, "I'm human. I did that." By saying “I’m human,” she is mitigated her so-called apology.
I hate mitigated apologies! Something I learned in therapy is when someone apologizes by saying, “I’m sorry, but…” it basically means they are not sorry and you shouldn’t be mad at them. To have a person of the cloth give a mitigated apologies for what was obviously a mistake on her part just discredits them. If I was that church, I would boot her out of her position.
Also, I want to point out that the waitress Chelsea Welch who put a photo of the receipt online should have been fired because that was a dumb move and very irresponsible on her part.
If you’re working in a restaurant, you have to expect people to be jerks. If you’re really good to people, they might leave you a good tip and it will even out those who tip poorly. To insure the best tip, don’t change the way you do your job, otherwise, don’t be a server! Its part of the game, on the flip side, if you’re amazing with your service, then someone might over tip you!
I hope both these people learned a lesson about what not to say and do.
A few days ago during Group Therapy, we read an email from a Rock-A-Holic named Leo who is having a problem with his wife and her Twitter page. His wife got a new job 6 months ago and is really enjoying it and talks about how cool her co-workers are.
Even though Leo is happy for her, he’s noticed that she has long back and forth flirtatious conversations with one of her male co-workers on Twitter. His wife isn’t hiding these messages because they are public tweets, but they are making him uneasy.
Some women still don’t want to admit that flirting while in a committed relationship is wrong. It is emotional cheating when a woman flirts with someone who is not her husband but those women who do that don’t admit to it.
When women emotionally cheat, it gives some of them the same sensation as a man when he physically cheats yet a man is the only one who looks like the bad guy.
If you want to flirt, then don’t be in a committed relationship.
This co-worker is a jerk for flirting with a married woman; he really wants to have sex with her and I know this because no guy goes out of his way to flirt with a woman if he didn’t want to get her into bed.
Leo mentioned that his wife 37 years old; the fact that she is publically flirting tells me that she is probably enjoying the attention and feeling attractive in the eyes of this other man so I would not be surprised if something has happened between them already.
We men don’t need women in our lives who are going to mistreat us like this so I believe Frank should put it a stop to the Twitter flirting or tell her he’s out there door.
Yesterday during the Lukewarm Topic, we talked about the rash life changing decision a woman made…24 hours after meeting her boyfriend.
Russian college graduate Lesya Toumaniantz let her boyfriend Rouslan Toumaniantz tattoo "Ruslan," his name, across her face 5 inches tall in Gothic letters…the day after they met in person!
According to the news stories, they met online previously in a chat room and are now engaged.
A friend of the couple says, “I know that there are people who are terrified that Lesya has made a rash decision that she’ll regret horribly, but sometimes the best decisions are the ones you make in an instant with your heart rather than the ones long-debated in your mind.”
This is “The Power of Now” gone haywire. This is the Eckhart Tolle stuff that people have taken WAY beyond the extreme!
As a pragmatic kind of guy, this irritates me. I know some people love to “live in the moment” but I’ve always said that Eckhart Tolle should write two more books; “The Power of Then” and “The Power of When” because reflecting and pondering is also a big part of the human condition.
I believe that people who do this sort of thing where they do rash, life changing things like Lesya did are probably very unstable. I’m willing to bet money that Lesya has a lot of crazieness going on in her life.
That’s why whenever anyone says something along the lines of “the best decisions are the ones you make in an instant,” I consider it a red flag! Big decisions require thought and council from people you trust; it’s just not wise to make life changing decisions in the moment.
Last week, Dr. Phil interviewed Ronaiah Tuiasosopo, the man behind the whole Manti Te'o/ hoax, and revealed some sad information about his past.
Ronaiah admitted on Dr. Phil’s show that he was molested a number of times for many years. It started when he was 12-years-old and it was done by a Mormon pastor for troubled youths who was close to his father and family.
He was too ashamed to tell his father and didn’t want to make him “hate the church.” Sadly, the abuse kept happening and went to "every form of molestation and abuse you could think of." He also said that he had been raped more than once.
I think child rape should be considered the most heinous crime in society with the biggest penalties…even more so then murder.
My reason for this is when this happens to a child, they grow up in an enormous amount of pain and on many occasions, when they’re adults they end up hurting other people as well as themselves.
This crime has such a huge ripple effect on society and something has to be done about it. There are too many of these horrible human beings who have previous records that are out free.
Look at Ronaiah; he is another victim of child rape and look at the confused mess he’s become.
Steve made a good point that there have been people he has known in his life that have gone through this and a fair amount turn to drugs or alcohol; it drastically messes up their entire lives.
This should be the biggest crime someone can commit in America, and I believe our politicians should do something about it.
Last Friday, we received a text during Listeners on the Loose about what a teacher did on Twitter that got her in trouble.
A high school math teacher in Colorado named Carly McKinney is on paid administrative leave after she created a Twitter account by the name of CarlyCrunkBear where she posted photos of her half naked or smoking marijuana and having posted multiple posts about smoking marijuana on school grounds.
Here are some of her tweets:
'Watching a drug bust go down in the parking lot. It's funny cuz I have weed in my car in the staff parking lot.'
'Just got called Ms McCutie. Point for being clever, however you are still jailbait.'
Even though she is a math teacher at a high school, Carly is only 23-years-old putting her only 5-7 years older than her students!
You can't put someone this young in schools and expect that they can be mature and positive mentors. There should be a rule that you cannot become a teacher until you are at least 30. I think any younger than that is too damn young to be teaching kids.
At 23 she's still a kid; she's too emotionally young to really be able to educate kids and teens. She probably just got out of college and still has the party girl mentality. If she was an older teacher, she would know that this kind of behavior is completely “career inappropriate.”
Yesterday on the show, we read an email from a Rock-A-Holic named Jeff who was thinking about doing something that would make him look like an insensitive jerk.
Near the property line of his house, there is a memorial of someone who died in a drunk driving accident when the car hit a tree dead on and it’s been there for over a year.
From time to time, there will people who show up to this memorial and leave flowers. Jeff is tired of this sad monument every time he leaves or comes home and wanted to know if he should write them a note asking them to remove it or if he should just remove it himself.
Society seems to have gotten to a point where it believes that if they’re in pain, they get to do whatever they want. I understand that everyone goes through all kinds of pain and tough times, but I’m here to say that no, just because you’re in pain you can’t do whatever you want.
People are going to think I’m a jerk to say this but, when it comes to grieving, I’ve always seen that as a private and personal thing. I don’t understand why it has to be on display for everyone to see. It would suck to see a reminder of death every time you want to leave your house!
It’s one thing if there is an actual memorial there for the person but something like what Jeff is describing, there should be a limit for how long it’s out there.
By having it there, they are affecting the mood of people who had no idea who these victims were; it’s a heavy thing to put on anyone and it isn’t fair.
If you want to celebrate someone’s life, why do it on the spot they died? When I think about my mother or father, I celebrate their lives by remembering them when they were happy and laughing, not by thinking about or looking at their tombstones.
