SHOW # 1525 JUNE 27 2012

You can't always pick our neighbors, and yet, they can have a profound impact on your quality of life.  If you're lucky, you have good neighbors, but let's face it the facts, there's a good chance that your neighbors suck... or maybe YOU'RE the sucky neighbor.  Hell, we have a story today about two neighbors in New Jersey.  They have some kind of history, and yesterday, after some kind of argument, one of them farted at the other one.  This provoked the other neighbor to pull a gun and threaten to blow his head off.  Then we stumbled onto a story where a guy discovered that his neighbor had been huffing the Freon from his air-conditioning unit.  On the other hand, that would explain why the neighbor was always so, so, SO high.  And we have the results from a survey that asked the top 10 things we hate about our neighbors.  Share it with you in a minute.  In the meantime, answer this:  WHO WAS OR IS YOUR NIGHTMARE NEIGHBOR?
Here are the survey results:  TOP 10 THINGS WE HATE ABOUT OUR NEIGHBORS:
Trash Everywhere
Overgrown grass or weeds
Broken garden furniture
Overgrown hedges
Dead grass
A half- finished deck or paving
A garden that's totally paved over
Children's toys permanently left out
Astroturf instead of real grass
Cheap imitation Greek statues
Guilty of any of the above?
As for your stories:
Lived next to the Washington State equivalent of the Wild Whites of West Virginia... these are the people who kept grand pa's dead body in the trailer for 2 weeks to collect his social security checks
Believes that HE is the bad neighbor because he blasts his music and he's pretty sure that all of his neighbors have seen him naked... hopefully by accident
Used to live next to a halfway house for a mental hospital
Currently lives next to drug dealers... like that's a BAD thing
His neighbor "collects" (hoards) all kinds of "stuff" (sh*t)
Dude who he STILL lives next door beat his dog to death with a 2x4 just LAST MONTH.. cops don't have 'proof', so no charges have been filed. 
Lived below a woman who had 2 greyhounds... BOTH of whom had separation anxiety.  To make it worse, he and the woman worked completely opposite shifts, so he had to endure the dogs' mania while he was trying to sleep
Currently lives next to a 4- room house that is populated by 2 welfare mothers that are packing 5 kids EACH... it's as much of headache as it sounds
Lived next to a mother who was ALSO a hooker, so all kinds of "strange" (meaning 'horny') men were visiting at all hours.  Every- so- often they would knock on the wrong door
When she lived in DC, she discovered that her neighbor had set up a video camera outside of her bedroom window
His neighbor, has 33 cats... they live in a duplex with a common attic crawl- space... that's where she leaves tuna and the litter boxes for her cat army
Lives next to his IN- LAWS... he's today's winner... or loser, really
That's a wrap, bitches.
Until tomorrow, vegetables are what food eats, so STAY BEAUTIFUL!"

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Locations : New JerseyWest Virginia

06/27/2012 5:30PM
SHOW # 1525 JUNE 27 2012
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06/28/2012 3:25PM
I was that neighbor, but it wasn't my fault!
A day late but hopefully a good enough story for you. I lived on the coast and my (now) ex brought home a young dog he found in eastern Washington. This dog would escape the fence each day and collect all sorts of things from the neighborhood. He would collect downspouts (the longest was a 6 ft section), fishing bouys, shoes, small plastic furniture and toys (he preferred dinosaurs). He would stack them in neat little piles in the front yard and the toys on the front porch. I had to somehow get rid of all the evidence before any of my neighbors found out. I couldn't exactly return these items due to the chewed and mangled state they were in. Surprisingly, the toys were never harmed and placed gently in a row on the porch. I don't think any of my neighbors suspected anything, and the perpetual wind on the coast was blamed for the missing downspouts. The dog finally calmed down and stopped being an escape artist and avid collector. He is still with me today in a secure fenced yard and ended up being the best dog I have ever had. FYI - He is a 150 pound flat coated retriever. Susan
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