Great news everyone... according to a survey from Trojan Condoms, you're going to have sex 31 times more this year than you did last year; and, naturally, they'd know. The bad news is, you won't enjoy it as much. Again, how could they NOT know this? I blame it on "50 Shades of Gray", a.k.a., "What Soccer Moms REALLY Like when They Aren't Pretending to Be Bitches". Am I wrong? Meanwhile, a guy named Chrostopher Anderson is the author of a new Mick Jagger biography, where he claims that Mick and his big head have bedded about 4000 people. Emphisis on 'people', as not all of his sexual conquest have been women. And it seems that little Justin Bieber is looking to join the 4- digit club himself. Apparently, he and his current action, Selen Gomez, are having relationship trouble and, according to a so- called source, it's because little Justin is coming to the realization that as an 18- year- old millionaire mega- star, he can tap pretty much any woman he wants... and he wants to. That might be the first thing he's done that I can applaud. Oh, and fairly hot U.S. Women's Soccer goalie Hope Solo recently admitted that during the 2008 Olympics, she dragged some random 'celebrity' back to her room and offered him up a slice. She won't say who it was, and we don't care. That's what makes it 'legendary'. That leads to today's question: WHAT'S THE STORY OTHERS TELL ABOUT YOU THAT HAS BECOME SEXUAL LEGEND, AND IS IT TRUE?
His friend tells the story of the time he brought home a woman "of larger carriage" and when they had sex, the entire house shook and he left the bedroom with a limp... the worst part is that the rotund woman was the girlfriend of one of his roommates... she'd just gotten into town and lived with them for the next SIX MONTHS (true)
Hooked up with a woman in the military who had guns in her bed because she had that fetish... she also had a ferret that climbed in bed and nuzzled his man- satchel. (true) He also slept with a woman who was the daughter of a Klansman (True)
Once had a three- way with two lesbians (false)
Everyone thinks he sleeps with the models he photographs (false... but it shouldn't be)
Was once filmed (unknowingly) having sex with a pumpkin (True... and unfortunate)
Had sex with a midget stripper (true)
The story that is told is that he had sex with "an insanely fat chick" (true) for 8 hours (maybe)
Rumor has it that he outlasted a woman in bed (false)
There were more stories but we weren't sure there was a point being made beyond the fact that they had sex... period. That's good, we're happy for you, but we weren't just asking IF you had sex, we were looking for that story that we may or may not believe. Oh well, still enjoyed the sex stories.
OK bitches, have some work related stuff to do.
Until tomorrow, lick it, stick it and STAY BEAUTIFUL!"