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SHOW # 1702 APRIL 18 2013

"Hola,
 
Are you familiar with the group known as 'One Million Moms'?  In a nutshell, they're a group of sexually repressed women who've created what amounts to the 'fun police' of broadcast.  Put it this way, if it's more cutting edge than, say, "Little House on the Prairie", they're likely to be offended.  Instead of simply not watching or listening to things they don't like, they go on the offensive to have these things cancelled because they believe that (a) they know what's right for you and (b) you should not have the ability to make decisions for yourself.  Yea, they're one of 'those' groups.  They've protested Spencer's Gifts because they sell adult novelty gifts... to adults.  They protested Claire's (a jewelry and accessories place because they sold 'Fifty Shades of Gray' iPhone cases.  They complained to the FCC because they heard an f- bomb during the Super Bowl (a LIVE SPORTING event), they've protested ABC because of the show "666 Park Avenue" because the address was 666. they protested NBC for the comedy "The New Normal" because it features a gay couple, they've protested Ragu spaghetti sauce, Skittles, Oreo cookies, etc, etc, etc.  Their latest target is K- Mart because K- Mart created a funny commercial.   Oh my.  Well, the One Million Moms aren't the only group of lunatics and self- righteous idiots looking for a problem that doesn't exist.  In this world... COUNTRY... of rampant 'political correctness', certain home builders are now referring to the master bedroom as the 'owner's suite'.  Why?  Apparently, in 2013, 'master' now recalls slavery or misogyny.  (face palm).  Today's question:  WHAT DID YOU DO TO UNINTENTIONALLY OFFEND SOMEONE?
 
Met a woman at a festival and called her 'precious', as in, cute... problem was, it was fat black chick and the movie "Precious" had just come out
 
Had a Jewish girl over for a dinner date... he made pork
 
Was making fun of the name Martha to his girlfriend... her dead mother's name was Martha
 
Worked security at a NAVY base and had to check ID's... commented that woman looked like a crack head; his partner pointed out that the 'crack head' was his wife
 
Once told someone that their accent was 'beautiful'.  Turns out that they didn't have an accent, they had a speech impediment as the result of a stroke
 
His wife is Chinese, and the two of them went to get Chinese take out... the food got cold on the way home, so he suggested that they should reheat the food when they got home, but what he said was, "We should nuke the Chinese".
 
Was buying artichokes today at a market and commented, "look at those fatties"... he meant the artichokes, not the fat dude who was unloading them
 
Customer was having a difficult time explaining what he was looking for, so our caller, playfully, said, "spit it out!".  The customer said, "s- s- s- sorry."  Ooh.
 
Told a dead baby joke... 2 weeks after his OWN SISTER had a still birth.  Still feels bad
 
OK bitches, I'm outta here.  Babysitting duty tonight, as the wife goes to see Prince.
 
Until tomorrow, just touch it and STAY BEAUTIFUL!"



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People : MarthaOncePrince




 
04/18/2013 5:52PM
SHOW # 1702 APRIL 18 2013
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