SHOW # 1752 JULY 9 2013

Former Mets pitcher Kris Benson USED to be married to former FHM model Anna Benson.  She was the Baseball Wife who once famously commented that if he were to cheat on her, she'd sleep with every player on the team.  That was then, this is now; they're separated... have been for about a year... and she's under the impression that Kris owes her $30,000.  Maybe he does, but on Sunday, she went to his house with a handgun, 13 rounds of ammo, a hatchet, a bag of syringes, an ammo vest, a bullet- proof vest, a knife and an expandable baton... and demanded her money.  Instead of giving her money, Kris ran and hid in the woods and called the cops.  She was arrested and is currently cooling her Z(high) heels in jail.  To be fair, we don't know what led to their initial breakup, but based on current events, we're guessing it has something to do with her being batsh*t crazy.  Just a guess.  Anyone who's ever gotten out of a relationship probably ignored hundreds of red flags along the way, before finally having that moment of clarity when you just know it's time to call it quits.  That leads to today's question:  I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEY WERE CRAZY WHEN ______________ HAPPENED.
When she said she'd make out wit her own brother
When he found out that his girlfriend drank animal blood
When he found his wife in the corner of the closet crying for no particular reason.  That was 10 years ago, but they're still married and she, apparently, is crazier now
Knew her boyfriend was crazy when he asked to use the hilt of his SWORD as a sex toy on her
When she went on Jerry Springer
His girlfriend thought she got pregnant from CUDDLING ON THE COUCH... they'd been dating for 3 months and had never had sex... nevertheless, she thought she was pregnant.  There is NOTHING wrong with sex education.  It doesn't condone teen sex any more than having a police force condones crime.  It's called 'pattern recognition'.
Met a girl at a party who, at the time, was looking for a knife to stab his buddy.  In spite of that, he took her home anyway... and things ended poorly
When, after only 2 months of dating, she agreed to have sex with him... but she didn't want him to use a condom and said, "put your babies in me!"
His girl brushed her teeth BEFORE every meal and folded DIRTY laundry
Knew she might be crazy when he ran into the grocery store to grab whatever, came out and there she was, standing on a bench taking a sh*t in public
Pearl Jam announced that they will be embarking on a North American tour in the very near future (including a show here in Seattle on December 6th) so with that in mind, we presented the Top 10 Pearl Jam songs... as voted on by Rolling Stone readers.  Here's a link:
OK bitches, I'm outta here like Vladimir... who, apparently, was well known for announcing when he left.
Until tomorrow, check your head and STAY BEAUTIFUL!"

Tags :  
Locations : Seattle
People : Anna BensonKris Benson

07/09/2013 6:14PM
SHOW # 1752 JULY 9 2013
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