Our friends at āCrackedā have done the research and come up with ā11 Useful Products Too Embarrassing to Useā.Ā Ā Ā Fellasā¦ ever screw up your goatee while shaving?Ā If so, the āGoatee Saverā might be the thing you need, but like Cracked suggests, your pride will probably prevent it from ever happening.Ā Ladies, ever have to go to the bathroom but the line is longer than you can hold your flow, or you canāt find a bathroom in the first place?Ā The Womenās P-EZ Travel Urinal lets you pee in your pants without any of that pesky wetness.Ā Wait, what?Ā No buyers?Ā Due to who you are thereās at least one product you HAVE to buy thatās embarrassing because what you buy speaks volumes about whatās going on in your life.Ā Something as small as Odor- Eaters tell the world that your feet stink.Ā Bean- O and Gas- X scream āI fart to the point that it hurts!ā, while buying Depends shares the secret that you sh*t yourself with alarming regularity.Ā Vagisil quietly announces that your āmossy cottageā smells like Red Lobster and Rid Shampoo reveals that you have crabs AT THE MOMENT!Ā No one buys Rid to be preventive, you buy Rid because your b*lls are CURRENTLY itching.Ā It might be humiliating, but itās necessary.Ā Today we wanted to know:Ā WHATāS THE MOST EMBARRASSING THING YOU HAVE TO PURCHASE AT THE CHECK- OUT LINE AND WHAT PRODUCT DO YOU HAVE AT HOME THAT YOU HOPE NO ONE ELSE EVER SEES?
Away we go:
It wasnāt for him, but when he was 14 he was sent to the store to buy stool softener for his grandfatherā¦ WHAT IT SAYS ABOUT YOU:Ā āMy poops are hurting my buttholeā.
Uses womenās shaving cream for his faceā¦WHAT IT SAYS ABOUT YOU:Ā āMy face is as sensitive as a vaginaā
She gets embarrassed to check romantic novels out of the libraryā¦ WHAT IT SAYS ABOUT YOU:Ā āIām lonely and I masturbate a lotā¦ to Fabioā
Sex lube and Nairā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āCome in through the back door, but let me clear the rain forest between my legs first!ā
Once bought a box of condoms and summer sausage at the same time.Ā Wasnāt thinking about it until he got to the check-out line and got āthe lookā.Ā WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āIām into some really weird sh*t!ā
Owns pomegranate scented dish soapā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āNever tried a penis I didnāt likeā
Buys Enzyte penis enlargement pillsā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā speaks for itself
Vagisilā¦ hereās the thing, he buys it for HIM!Ā Heās not circumcised and gets yeast infections (excuse me while I vomit).Ā WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āItās not for me, Iām a guy!Ā Why would I have a yeast infection?ā
Ridā¦ when he bought it, he was trying (to no avail) to convince the cashier that it was for his 2 non- existent kids.Ā WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āMy satchel is infested with living creatures.Ā I sleep with dirty, dirty whores.ā
There was this time she bought chocolate ice cream and menstrual pads.Ā Neither is bad on its own, but together it says:Ā āDonāt bother me for a week, Iām not in the f**king mood!ā
He had to run to Wal- Mart to buy his wife an enema (which, on a side note, is so incredibly sexy)ā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āMy ass is like a malfunctioning cement mixerā.
Bought a DNA test, but it was for her, NOT to determine who the father of her children isā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āI want to determine who the father of my children is!ā
Heās 25- years- old and has to buy Dependsā¦ not for him, but for his Great Dane who leaves āmurder scenesā around the house when she goes into heatā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āItās for me because I canāt control my sphincterā.
Bought an electric turkey carver and a pregnancy test in one stopā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āIf Iām pregnant, Iām taking care of this myselfā
Happened to purchase Monistat and halibut in one tripā¦ the cashier made a commentā¦ WHAT IT SAYS:Ā āIf the Monistat doesnāt work, maybe people will think itās the halibutā.
Doctor prescribed Aldara for a medical condition he hasā¦ the thing is, he doesnāt have anal warts, but Aldara is for anal wartsā¦ WHAT IT SAYSā¦ āI have the most disgusting ass youāve ever seen.ā
Went with his father to Loverās Package (bad idea) to help him select a SEX TOY for HIS MOTHER (worse idea).Ā Everyone assumed they were a couple, but he made it worse when he said, āno, itās my dadā
SIT AND SPIN
Jolene came in today to share with us the top 10 prog- rock bandsā¦ according to Rolling Stone Magazine.Ā As a prog- rock fan, I was loving it.Ā Hereās a link to her list:
OK, thatās a wrap.
Until tomorrow, rock on, rock out and STAY BEAUTIFUL!ās