Maybe you saw the news this morning and thought Carlos Santana or Gene Simmons had been killed‚Ä¶ but no, that was Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi.¬† After 42 years of ruling Libya with an iron fist and months of bloody clashes with rebel forces, Gadhafi was killed.¬† There are conflicting reports, but rumor has it that he was hiding in a ditch or something.¬† Who knows?¬† We know Saddam Hussein was hiding in a hole when American forces found his hairy ass, and Osama bin Laden was living large in a mansion in Pakistan¬† because he knew American forces were looking for him in Afghanistan.¬† The point being, he was looking to avoid American forces at all costs‚Ä¶ and I think we know why.¬† Most of us aren‚Äôt quite the pathetic, ego- maniacal douche- bags that dictators and terrorists are, and most of us don‚Äôt have entire countries looking to hunt us down, but all of us, in the course of our lives, screwed up or screwed someone over and make it a point to avoid crossing paths with the offended parties.¬† Whether you owe someone money, slept with somebody else‚Äôs girlfriend (or boyfriend) or just said some choice words you now regret, there‚Äôs someone out there you hope to NOT run into.¬† Today we wanted to know, OTHER than an ex:¬† WHO‚ÄôS THE ONE PERSON ON THE PLANET WHO YOU SHOULD AVOID AT ALL COSTS AND WHY?
Her own mother‚Ä¶ not because her mother is an overbearing bitch or anything, but because she‚Äôs incontinent and refuses to wear an adult diaper.¬† In other words, she avoids her mother because her mother is a poop- in- the- pants machine.¬† I get it.
His boss‚Ä¶ his boss is a douche, but more than that, he doesn‚Äôt like his boss getting too close to him because it‚Äôs likely that the boss will smell the booze on his breath.¬† Seems strange to me‚Ä¶ never had a job where I wouldn‚Äôt just inform my co-workers that I‚Äôm still drunk from the night before.¬† On the other hand, this particular guy works in security and I work in the farthest thing from it
A specific co- worker who just won‚Äôt shut the hell up when he sees you.¬† There‚Äôs one at every work place
Wants to avoid the ‚Äúdirty‚ÄĚ DEA agent he had to deal with‚Ä¶ personally, I try to avoid DEA agents whether they‚Äôre ‚Äėdirty‚Äô or on the level, but that‚Äôs just me.
His ex‚Äôs father‚Ä¶ his ex moved in with him on her 18th birthday and her father was none too happy about it.¬† We don‚Äôt know how things ended or what went wrong, but he still feels compelled to avoid her father.¬† Probably a good idea
His ex- wife‚Äôs mother‚Ä¶ quite the opposite of above; when his ex announced that she wanted a divorce, her mother started hitting on him.¬† Said she‚Äôs good looking, but it ain‚Äôt right and she won‚Äôt stop the pursuit
His sister‚Äôs ex‚Ä¶ he was a meth addict AND physically abused his sister.¬† If he sees him, he‚Äôll kick his ass
Needs to avoid his ‚Äúfriend‚ÄĚ who‚Äôs been in prison for the last year because he‚Äôs been f**king his girlfriend for the last 12 months.¬† This is NOT going to end well
OK bitches, I‚Äôm outta here for the day!
Have yourselves a fine evening‚Ä¶ or don‚Äôt.¬† Your choice.
Until tomorrow, smile for the camera and STAY BEAUTIFUL!‚ÄĚ