Thrill

 


SHOW # 1379 November 1 2011

“Hola,

A couple in Honolulu stole two five- dollar sandwiches from a Safeway and had their 3- year- old daughter taken away by the state.  They paid for $50 worth of groceries, but forgot to ring up the sandwiches.  They were stopped by security, at which point they admitted their mistake and offered to pay, but the cops were called, they were arrested and their kid was taken away.  In retrospect, the state now admits that they may have overreacted, but in these modern times, seems that everything is a threat to kids.  There’s a woman in New York City who caught flack when people found out that her 10- year- old son takes the subway to school.  Their point is that it’s dangerous, but it’s not nearly as dangerous as they think it is.  Hell, when I was going to school in Baltimore, there were no yellow school busses, you got on a regular city bus with the crack heads and weirdo's and went to school.  But times have changed.  That leads to today’s question:  WHAT DID YOUR PARENTS DO BACK IN THE DAY THAT IF THEY DID IT NOW YOU’D HAVE BEEN TAKEN AWAY?

Spanking his naked ass… these days you’d probably get pulled up for abuse AND child porn

Walked alone to and from school

Mother was a bartender, so after school he’d walk to the bar and do his homework there… unlikely to fly these days

Mother used to spank him with a belt… I remember those days, and not fondly

Her father would drink and drive with her in the car… he’d make her throw the empty cans out of the window to get rid of the evidence.  Drunk driving AND littering

Mother bought him smokes at age 9, let him smoke pot at age 10, and for his 16th birthday she threw him a keg party

Parents left him in a crib at a hotel while they had dinner… they weren’t with some responsibility; they took the phone off the hook so that the person working the hotel switchboard could “listen” should he need anything.  After a few minutes of screaming and crying, the switchboard operator figured that there might be something amiss (yes, I wrote ‘amiss’) so she found his parents in the restaurant and instead of telling them to go up to their room, she had them listen to the phone (???).  Eventually they went upstairs to check on him where they discovered he’d broken the crib and was hanging upside down from the side rail

Used to rub whiskey on his gums when he was teething… other than being a waste of perfectly good whiskey, is that so wrong

Got his ass whipped with a homemade paddle… ah, those were the days

Used to climb ladders, use power tools, climb through rafters, etc when he’d help his dad with projects

Dad threw him in the pool when he was little to teach him how to swim… it works when you’re done panicking

Got liquor in his stocking when he was a kid

SIT AND SPIN
Maybe you were around for the ‘70s, maybe not, either way Jolene treated us to the 10 worst songs of the 1970’s.  Usually there’s room for argument with these types of lists, but I have to say, I think they got this one right.  If you missed the segment, well, you’re lucky.

OK bitches, I’m out.  Trivia night.

Until tomorrow, Juice Newton and STAY BEAUTIFUL!”


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Locations : BaltimoreHonoluluNew York City
People : Juice NewtonMotherSTAY BEAUTIFUL




 
11/01/2011 6:07PM
SHOW # 1379 November 1 2011
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