SHOW # 1384 November 8 2011

A man by the name of Thomas Klein, a professor at the University of Heidelberg in Germany, recently completed a study that, deep- down, we already knew; everyone already knows. He studied 2000 people between the ages of 16 and 60 and came to the conclusion that that people who suddenly start dieting while in a relationship are preparing to break up with their “other half”. That’s not a guarantee, but the gist of it is this; happy couples don’t worry about getting fatter and uglier because there’s less pressure to be attractive… you’ve attracted the person you want to be with and if you’re happy together, you’re less concerned about each other’s looks. Picture your grandparents to get an idea. In other words, your wife’s or husband’s sudden need to get into shape has nothing to do with making them more attractive to YOU. Shocking. If you’re a fan of sitcoms, there’s one of two ways to determine if your favorite show has entered its final season; (1) the main character or characters suddenly have a baby or adopts a little kid. This particular formula has spelled doom for countless sitcoms over the last 50 years. Ah, the other way to know a sitcom is in its death- throws is if actor Ted McGinnley gets a regular role. Just know that your show has entered its final season. Today we’re talking omens, defined as ‘something that foretells the future’… or as we call it, “a red flag”. IN HINDSIGHT, WHAT SHOULD HAVE CLUED YOU IN THAT THE END WAS NEAR?
His girlfriend decided she wanted a car instead of sharing his truck… he bought her a car and she left him 2 days later
Asked her boyfriend if he could live without her if he had more money and he answered “yes” (on a quick side note, most men would HAVE more money without their significant other). Anyway, a week later he got a better job and he broke up with her.
Saw the handwriting on the wall when Clay Bennett bought the Sonics
Knew it was over when his ex stopped having sex with him… yea, but that still takes time to figure out… as in, how long did you go sex free before you realized that SHE wasn’t going sex free
He knew the “Man Show” was over when Joe Rogan and Doug Stanhope took over as hosts
Knew things were coming to an end when her boyfriend laid down an ultimatum… I don’t care WHO you are, if you get an ultimatum, get the hell out
She kept getting home later and later until she finally just confessed that she was sleeping around
He started shopping for new clothes, got a new haircut and he started locking his phone in the car at night… yea, that’s a lot of red flags
She wanted fake boobs, he bought them for her and she dumped him… gentleman, if your woman wants new boobs and it wasn’t your idea, let her pay for them, that way, when she dumps you, you don’t lose the money
Her ex always brought up how many other women wanted him… yea, right
Kept giving his “artist” girlfriend a ride to her “artist” friend’s house so they do “art”… in other words, he was dropping his girlfriend off at the door of her booty call
She decided to go back to school without discussing with him
So Led Zeppelin IV came out on this day 40 years ago and to honor it, Jolene treated us to the top 10 bands that rip or have ripped off Led Zeppelin. Check it outhere:
I’m out!
Until tomorrow, moon walk and STAY BEAUTIFUL!”

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Topics : Human Interest
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People : Clay BennettDoug StanhopeJoe RoganTedThomas Klein

11/08/2011 5:51PM
SHOW # 1384 November 8 2011
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