SHOW # 1446 February 27 2012

The manager of K-Mart in North Seattle was shot over the weekend by a would- be burglar who was demanding that he give them all the money in the store's safe.  We're not here to tell you how to commit a crime, but who robs a K- MART?!?  There's Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, Tiffany's, Barney's... again, not trying to encourage you to rob anywhere, but if you're gonna risk going to jail, aim higher than K- Mart.  Just sayin'... if you're gionna go to jail for, say, grand theft auto and you have the choice between a Ferrari and an AMC Pacer, choose wisely.  Similarly, yesterday afternoon in Federal Way, a family feud involving some 20 family members ended with at least 2 of them with knife wounds.  This went down at the Old County Buffet.  Come on... we expect this type of thing at Chuck E. Cheese, but the OCB?  Then there was a story we brought you last month of a Chicago man who jumped up from the front row of a movie theatre naked.  Thing is, the movie in question was Alvin and the Chipmunks:  Chipwrecked.  No one expected to see that, and that's the basis of today's question:  WHERE IS THE LAST PLACE YOU EXPECTED TO SEE WHAT IT IS YOU SAW?
Walked into the bathroom of a grocery store in Kirkland and discovered a guy shooting up heroin
Was driving on Highway 99 and was shocked to see a guy 'doing the Heisman' across 5 lanes of traffic... more shocked that the guy didn't get hit by a car
Looked out the window in his kitchen to his backyard where there were 5 cops with their guns drawn... they weren't aimed at him, but at his shed, where they later removed a shirtless meth- head
Went to work and was treated to the vision of two hawks having sex
Filled in as a high school bus driver and was shocked to see a girl in the back of the bus giving a BJ... high school didn't work out quite that well for me
Was treated to a brawl inside of a grocery store... Tide spilled everywhere (???)... cops showed up and just pepper- sprayed the whole place
Pulled into the Park and Ride and found a large, brown dildo with a suction cup on one end
Went to a MMA fight and EXPECTED to see the usual Tapout T- shirt wearing douche bags get in a fight, but instead, he saw two 70- year- old women get into a fistfight over a slot machine in the casino
Was at a mall just outside of Battle Creek, Michigan where he and his lady bumped into a cross- dressing Amish man at the Victoria's Secret.  Everything about it is wrong
Used to live across the street from conjoined twins... used to freak everyone out who didn't know they lived there.  According to her, everyday you could count on a car wreck as some unsuspecting motorist would drive by, be astonished by what they saw and plow into the back of another car
Was 7 and a half miles into a hike when he and his buddy came upon two naked women sword fighting in the middle of the woods.  This is not the kind of thing that happens very often
OK bitches, that's a wrap for the day.
Until tomorrow, slip, slide and STAY BEAUTIFUL."

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Locations : ChicagoMichiganSeattleVictoria

02/27/2012 5:34PM
SHOW # 1446 February 27 2012
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