If you're a smoker of tobacco, you know the drill; in spite of the fact that smoking is legal, the only place to do it is outdoors and to partake in the habit you spend considerable taxes... you're still treated like an uninvited leper at an orgy. And I would know, as I'm both a smoker and a leper who shows up announced at orgies. Again, smoking is legal, but you wouldn't know it from public reaction. You know what else is legal? Octopus fishing. Nevertheless, like smoking, octopus poaching just doesn't sit well with folks around here, legal or not. 19- year- old Dylan Mayer found this out last week when he and a friend snagged themselves a giant octopus last week off the shore of West Seattle. He didn't break any laws, but there was so much outrage that Fish & Wildlife announced TODAY that they're considering a ban on the practice. As for Dylan, he said if he'd known that people cared so much, he wouldn't have done it. Well, too late now. One thing that most of us agree on is that bestiality is really f**king disgusting, but if you live in Montana, Arkansas or North Carolina you can get as frisky with Fluffy as you'd like. Bestiality is completely legal there. So your neighbors can get upset, but there's nothing they can do about it legally. Kinda like the Westboro Baptist Church protesting at soldier's funerals, Doug Hutchison marrying an underage girl or me farting: WHAT PERFECTLY LEGAL THING DO YOU DO THAT CAUSES THE MOST GRIEF?
Openly carries a pistol
Carries a concealed hand gun
Actually comes to a complete stop at STOP signs
He voted for Obama and is "extreme" right- wing father disowned him... which makes complete sense because his son's one vote was the difference
She's an attractive woman with big (.)(.)'s who drives a heavy truck for a construction company... a lot fo the men have a problem with this
Skiis too fast... actually gets ticketed by ski patrol for it
Drives the speed limit... hate to admit it, but yea, that drives me crazy
She works as a dog trainer and some people take offense that she uses shock collars
Lives in an apartment complex and pisses off his neighbors because he cooks bacon in his underwear on the balcony (???)
Used to be a repo man and, as you'd expect, no one was ever happy to see him
Installs natural gas lines and, as a result, has to tear up streets to do it... people are always getting pissy with him about it
Used to take walks on the beach with his 8- foot boa constrictor draped around his neck... lots of weird looks, but a lot of space
He's a telemarketer... everyone hates him
Hunting... not everyone cares for it, the animals in particular
OK bitches, the weekend is here, but remember this weekend that it's Veteran's Day, and if anyone deserves a little recognition and respect, it's the vets. Remember that and act accordingly. If you are a vet, have yourself an extraordinary weekend and take the time to pat yourself on the back. I know you guys try not to do that sort of thing, but every once- in- a- while you have to say 'f**k it'. So, this weekend, say f**k it.
Until Tuesday, do what you do best and STAY BEAUTIFUL!"