Seattle had a strange week last week. On Wednesday, two guys got into an argument about TV volume. After exchanging a few choice words and colorful metaphors, one of the men was assaulted... with a tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter. Seriously. a few days later, in the International District, a crazy lady walked into the Dim Sum King restaurant and started yelling at everyone to "go back to China". To emphasize her position, she sprayed several employees and patrons with soy sauce AND chocolate milk. She's brought the chocolate milk with her. She was arrested. And in England, a guy by the name of Leon Smith was in bed sleeping when his girlfriend climbed into bed with him and started cuddling. Nah... it wasn't his girlfriend, it was a wild fox that had crept in through the cat door. Upon discovering the animal in his bed, they continued to cuddle for another 10 minutes before the fox got bored and wandered off. true. Sometimes these things happen... albeit, not very often. Maybe you've unexpectedly been covered in imitation butter, soy sauce, chocolate milk, or maybe you, too, have nuzzled with a wild animal... if so, you can answer today's question: WHAT'S BEEN ON YOU... AND HOW DID IT GET THERE?
His "friend" put a scorpion on his head while he slept... the scorpion stung him
At age 14, he leaned in for a kiss with a girl, but was sh*t on by a bird before he got the chance
Some guy sneezed and inadvertently launched a BLOODY booger onto his arm... and he's a germophobe
On a carnival ride, someone sitting in front of him puked... it landed all over him and his buddy
A skunk came into his house through a cat door and snuggled up to him in bed
He works as a prison guard (still... for some reason) and in addition to being hit with a cup of poop, pee andsemen, he was also once hit in the back of the head by a penis AND a pair of b*lls that the prisoner had ripped off of his own body. Yes, you read that right... a prisoner (who was mad at the guard) tore of his twig and berries and threw them at him. I've been really, really, REALLY angry before, but never THAT angry
SIT AND SPIN
We had a list of songs from bands that you might be surprised were written as an insult to other people. Anyway, here's the link:
OK bitches, I'm outtie... as the 'cool' kids say.
Until tomorrow, lick it, stick it, and STAY BEAUTIFUL!"