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SHOW # 957 January 6 '010

“Hola reflection haterolas,

Dating websites are all the rage these days, whether it’s match.com, chemistry.com or Jew2Jew.com.  While no one wants to admit to being a shallow and pretentious person, the truth is, you probably are… which is why pictures of potential suitors are so important that if you don’t like what you see, you won’t even entertain the thought of reading their profile.  Enter www.beautifulpeople.com, which asks, “do looks matter to you when it comes to selecting a partner?  Do you want to guarantee that all of your dates are attractive?  No more filing through unattractive people on mainstream sites.”  Keep in mind, to even be a member of the site you have to meet their criteria of a beautiful person.  Anyway, just yesterday, the folks at ‘beautiful people’ removed 5000 users from their site.  What happened?  Seems that 5000 people posted new photos on their dating profiles after they’d put on a few extra LB’s after gorging themselves during the holidays.  Their newly fattened faces cost them their membership.  As the website founder explained, “letting fatties roam the site is a direct threat to our business model…” We admire the guy for his honesty, but we know some people will be offended by the website’s position, but ask yourself, would YOU have a chance of being on beautifulpeople.com, and IF not, WHY not.  That’s what we wanted to know today:  HONEST TO GOD, THE UGLIEST PART OF ME HAS TO BE__________.

I’m lucky enough to be sexy all over.  Actually, my skinny – ass legs seem to earn comments (mostly insults) every time I wear shorts.

Too hairy

His “hairy white ass”

His yellow toenails

He has a big “Lemmy- style” boil on his cheek, as in the cheek on his face…. You nasty, bitches

His double chin… not the worst

Like many men who called today, he has mobs, better known as man- boobs

No particular part is any worse than any other, but the SUM of his parts earn him a 4 outta 10

Has an unusually long neck… and his nickname is Giraffe… seriously

Has a huge, Adrian Brody size nose… and that is truly unfortunate

His “British” features… meaning he has really bad teeth

He has a misshapen head… said that if you saw it from the top it looks triangular

Has teeny, tiny (creepy) hands

Alright bitches, gotta hustle and find out exactly what kind of small mammal is eating the cables under my car.  Don’t ask.

Until tomorrow, eat crab and STAY BEAUTIFUL!”


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01/06/2010 3:11PM
SHOW # 957 January 6 '010
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