Thrill's Big Brown Blog Attacks!

January 30, 2017

Hola,

Here we go with the squiggly red line...today was our Random Question Question. Each caller is asked a different, random question. After they share their answer, we reveal the story that inspired the question.

Make sense? No? Well...

So, a sizable number of the stories we collected over the weekend involved animals. In Australia, where (I'm convinced) EVERYTHING in nature is out to kill you, a woman discovered a snake (a carpet python, if it matters) in her leaf blower. The headline said the woman was "startled" to find the snake. Sorry, but being "startled" at finding an animal in Australia is like being "startled" to find a pillow in a pillowcase.  

Case-in-point, a different woman in Australia was out for a jog when she was attacked by a kangaroo. No reason for the attack other than it could attack, so it did.  She seriously got the sh*t kicked out of her.

And then there's the cheapskate in China. This guy bought his wife and kids tickets to the zoo, but he wouldn't spend the money on himself. No, he decided he would climb a fence and sneak into the zoo that way. Seems like a simple enough plan, but logistics, they're important. In this case, he didn't consider that on the OTHER side of that same fence was the tiger enclosure. He was eaten. He was ALMOST eaten. To be fair, he was "gnawed on" by one of the tigers, but not completely eaten. Incidentally, one of the four tigers that attacked him was shot in the face. Stupid tiger! What was it thinking...attacking an idiot?!?

All of those things suck, but as far as animal "attacks" go, the story that disturbed me most involved a cestode. Don't know what a 'cestode' is? A 'cestode' is a tapeworm. Not cool with tapeworms. And in this case, the tapeworm in question was 6 F**KING FEET LONG and was removed through the dude's mouth! Hell no.  Not cool.   

I'll leave you with that.

Until tomorrow, do what you do best and STAY BEAUTIFUL!